I really should come back to this, maybe when work isn't so busy/when i don't want to game

 
    
    
    
 we're still here.
    

Ǎ̵̢̢̡̡̧̨̨̡̢̧̢̡̛̰̦̼̳͎͔͕͎͙̺̘̖̜̹̣̮͇̤͚̱͇̱̰͉͓̮͚͔̤̦̩͎̤̭͕̪̱̘̘̱͕̗̦͓͎͉͇̟͉̜̦̤̼̺͇̰̤̮̘͙̻͕̹̝̻͔̭̱̲̹̬̝͇͍̋̊͊͌̔͋̾̓͌́̈́̀͋͌͗͒͊́̔̂̃̕̚͜͜͜͜͠ͅͅͅA̸̡̨̛͉̭̗̦͈̻̪̗̬͕̮̪̬͕͍͓̦͈͉̜͉̝͙̓̎̀̈̅̏̿́̋̔̔͋̿̿̏̽͆̈́͘Ą̷̢̨̧̧̨̡̛̺̹̠̯͓͕͉͎̫͖̩̩̭̹̤̜̝̼̠̳̲̤͉̺͖̫̝̬͔̬͎̜̖̹͔͖͖͍̳͖͎̤̦͍͉̭̝͙̙͕̻̰͍̥̮͎̲̲̰̹̪̓̒̈́̿̽̃̈́̆̓͌͗͌̉̃̍͒͆͌̓̄̔̔̂͊̍̉̀̐̊̚̚͜ͅA̷̡̢̧̡̧̧̡̛̛̛̛͈̺̞͉̜̙̖̺̜̫̹̱̩͔̘̭̼̰̜͕͍̳͕̣̰̹̠̝͙͖̩̭̮͍̦̞̞̭͉̞͈̻̪̞̼͚̠͎̅̊̈̓̎̃̆̌̿́̍́̾̄̈́̋͌̊̕͘͠͝͝͠ͅͅĄ̸̡̧̡̡̧̧̨̨̨̛͚̞̫̖͔̼̬͖̲̖͚̥̭̳͇̮͕̤̦̪̦͙̝͕̫̮̹̤̥̖̟̳̮̠̲̺̜̟̟̗͈̟̪͙̪̼̫̩̜̩̯̺̟̬̳͇͇̩̬̠̰̻͍̳͔̝̬̝̰̯̣̦̺̖̯̙͉̉͆̈́̇̓̑̀͗̆̽̀̎̅̂̒̒͛̆̔̽͛̒̍̋̄̿̑̀̿͛̄̓͛̄͐͗͂͒̎͊͂͊́̋͑̊̍̇͘̚̚̚͘͜͜͜͝͝͝ͅĂ̴̧̢̡̨̧̢̨̧̧̨̳̗̥̮̳̘̰̘͓͇̼͕̰̞̙͍̠̯͓̞̦̦̥͉͙̺͖͍̱̙̰͕͇̤̻̳͍̣͈̼̲̬͎̪̣̖͔̻̲̹̫̰͖̝̩̩̬̰̰͙̣͓̣̩̰͉̬̜͔̹̦̠͎̥̣͓̱̭̤̹͔̮̝͕̲̍̈́̒͒̎̊̕͜͜͜ͅͅÁ̷̧̢̡͉̬̣̹̱̭̼͔̞̮̖̫̱͈͓͉̲͚̝̩̹͙̮̬̻̞̥̯͇͍̫̭̙̻̠̋̽̄̐̈́̄̏͊̿̆̍̆̅́̃͌͗̓̿̍̈̈́́̆͒͒̈́̈̔̀̀̌̇̌̈́̄̌̄̚̚̚̚̕ͅͅĄ̶̨̢̨̢̧̧̨̢̨̛̛̛̹̙̜̜͚̤̝̘̹̲̗͉̹̳͍͖̣̤̻͈̳̝͈̻͚̖̗̜͈͉̙̺̙̩̩͖̖̰̮̱͙̗̲͔̗͖͍̜͈̟̤͕̱͖͍̜͖̗̜͈̙̪̬̬͎͔̪̰̦̲͕̥̰̩͉̬͔̞̠͍̭̘̯̙̤̫̪͉̩̣͎̣̯̹͈͉̦͕̳̅́̈́̆̓̎̃͗̎̏̓̈̍̑͋̇̀̀̈́͑̃͊͒̽̈̇́̋́̎̑̽͂̈́̂̔͐͛́͋́͒̐̊̊͛̈̎̾̉̀̈́͆̾̀̿̑̑̑͆̋̑̎͌̓̽͐͌́̎̎̎̽̍̂̈́̉̐̀͌́́̆̿̑͐̈̄̽̾̃̊̐̈́͗̏̚̕̚̚͘̚͝͝͝͝Ä̶̧̢̨̧̧̡̡̧̡̛̛̛̛͓̖͇̗̣͇̭͍͔͔̗͖̖͖̪̩̤̖̣̘̰̦̮̱̳̭͓͎̪͖͍͙̲̠̣̹̬͔̞͍͈͔͙̬͍͇͙̱̠̭̘͕͍̮̲͉̫̼͈͕̳̣̱̤͔̟̯̺̗̭͚̫̤̜̺̝̩̅̐͌̀̿͗̃̂̓̐͒̔́͋̓̂̐̋͊͋̈́̀̄͑̄̍̓͒̅̐̈́̒̒̉͐̄̓̔͌̓̔̆̑̈́͛̽͛͂̈́̆̚̕̚̕͜͠͠͝͝͝ͅͅͅͅͅȀ̵̢̢̨̧̛͕̭̬̫̠̺̯̟̫̠͍̣̪͇͕̙̳̤̼͔̘̪̘͓̲̦̹̰̩̻̟͍̙̰̙͉̐̇̍̽͊́̀̒͋̃͆̾͌́̃͑͑̈́͒͐͊̈́͂̾̋̈͌̆̾̈́͒̋͌̌̏̀̀̆͆͗̌̾͊̃́̃̆̿̋̐̇́̋̓̍̀̈́̉͗̌́̀͌͒͊͂͒̇͗͊̕̕͘͘̕̚̚͜͠͝͠͝Ą̶̡̧̧̧̡̧̢̡̡̛̛̛̛̛͓̤̬͕͈̟͔͖̭̼̰̼͕͓̹̱̤͕̖̮̰̼͇̤̬̩̥̝̦̩̠̗͓̳̻̟̝̦̥̩̻͆̃̈́̎͐̐̔̇̈̑̔̉̂͊͊̈́̄̏̀̃́̎͐̓̎͛̐̔͂͗̔̊͛̂̆͆̅̏͌̎͋͌̂͛͐́̅̿̉̎̀̀̐͗̏̒̑̔̏̑̏͂̓̓̀͊̈̈́̾̆̚̕̚̕͘͘͘̕̕̕̕͜͜͝͝͝͝ͅͅĄ̷̗̗̮̣̯̜̞͙̜͇̟͔̥̰͓͇̬̩͓̫͖̪͔͇̳̏̅̆̊͗͆̿̎̿̋̀̏̅̀͑͆́͂̓̿̄͂̏̌̈́̔̂͐̊͛̑͊̿̽̌̍̈́̍͒͗̇̀̑͘̚͜͜͝͝Ä̵̡̛̛̛̞̙͕̫̯̫̤͓͍̟̱́̏͛̃͗͌͂͊͋̆̀̊̂̒̿̑̇̀͋̂͋̓͗̾͐̒̀̆̀̄̌̓͂̃͋͂̒̏̈́̈́̓̆͋̊͋͗̾͆͋̾̄̿̏̊̐̅̐͗̓̏͆̅̃͗͗̾̇͑̓̋̒̿̂̔͒́͋̐͌̔͒̑͛̈́̔̋͗̌̓̂̈̀͗̾̕̕̚̚̕͘͠͝͠͝͝͝͠͝͝ͅͅͅA̴̛͉͌̿̊͐͒̿̈́̓̾̆̄̇̈́̈́͛͘̕A̷̧̡̡̢̱̭̣̫̻̭͕̝̬̪̪̥̖̪̩͚̣̬̫͓̰̤̹̮̥̫̺̻̲̗̥̝̹͖̟̋̐̌͋͂̀̄̓̽͆̅̑͊͊͋̌̔̂̂̕͝͝ͅÀ̷̢̢̧̢̨̛̪̳̹̫̪͚̫̘̩̖̠̲̣̲̳̞̙̹̤̘̱̥̗̫̙̤̝̩̬̖͙̘̠͇̬͖̩̙̥̘̪̞͎͖̜̹̱̝͔̘͕̮͚͓̞͎̖̣̺̠̠̲̤̠̻͈̹̤̗̣̪̹͖̗͔̱̙͔̼̦̰͍̝̜̮̯̮͉̏̉̿̏̎́̀͑̈́͗̒̈̀̄͛͛̊͑͐͛́̊̎͊͛͌̿̌̄̈̄͌͌̆̿̀͌̉̒̽̈͌̓̿̔͋̐̍̅̅̋͒̓́̑̔́̄̅͂͗̌̎̆̀̉̾̔̍̓̚̚̚̚̕͜͜͠͝͝͝͠͝ͅͅͅͅA̷̡̡̧̛̛̛̳͕̦͎̖̠̦͙̰̲̣̭̼̣̣͚͈̻̰͇̖̰͓̮̙̙̜̹̞̻̣̦̠̤̖̪̰͓̫̺̝͊̒̐̾͐̓̈́̍͒̌̈͑͛̓̇͑̈́̽͑̉̎̿̐̓̋͗̾͐͋͆̀̏̾͗̌̈́̈́̎̒̀̂͆́̀̌͐̐̎̾̍̾̽̽̂̓̉͑́͐̍̿̈̑̉̂̓̈̌̋̋̕̕͘̚̚̕͘̕͜͜͝͠͠͝͠ͅẢ̴̡̡̨̧̢̡̨̛̹̝̠̙̲̦̰̦̰̘̭͈̻͈̗̳̖̜̭͍̠̱̤̟̜̫̹̺̩̫̪͎̘̭̺͔̰̯̪̖͈̪̙̱͙̟̖͚̣̲̜̱̭̰̫̄͑̌͒́͐̈́͌͌́̑͆̈́̑̓̉̂͋̊͘͜͜͜͠Ą̴̨̨̨̧̨̨̢̢̧̨̡̲͕̩̮̼̦̜̳̱̗̱̰̱̣͙̫̫̣̙̬̖̖̯̯̦͇͉̟͍̖̬̰͚̪̬̞̬̬̤̲̟̠̤̯̥̗̮̱̗͕͓̻͚͖͚̱̪̗̜̻̟̪̰̣̝̤̫̠͎̖̭̫͉͇͎̺̻͎̯̲̖͓̬̻͔̲͌͐̉͛̀̽̄̋͆͌̉͐̂̽̂̆͒̎̂̄͘͜͠ͅÅ̷̡̡̩̼͈̪̹̘̬̳̘͈̯̪̬͖̜̖̩͖̪̱͖̹̤̘͖̤͈͙͎̺̭̫̙͕͇̪̜͖͓͉̗̱̦͉̮͚̺̻̗͉̻̖̬̺̖̬̻̥̮̗̻̝͍̞̜̖̝̠͖̯͍͓̖̘͉̰̟̟̼̣̭̉͆̂͌̾̅͊̒͛̑̎̊̏̈́́́̊̽͂̈́͛̃̀̿̌͗̆̔̏̏̅̐̽́̒̊͆͐̋̍̀͊͌̏͒̑̈́͗̽͘̕̕̕̚͘̕͜͜͝͝͝͝͝ͅA̸̡̡͚͈̠̱͓̙̻̱̺̫̙̩̥͈͎͔̤̫͈̬͚͈̠̙̤̘͉̩͉̞͔̼̟̪͈͍͍̞̗̥͖͋̇̄̇̓̀̋̔̚̚͜͜͜͠À̸̧̢̡̢̢̧̛̗͎̜͉͎̥̳͍̪̭̼̘͕̰̤̞̺̜̯̜̩͉̣͇̰̫͎͈̗̱̟̳̫̘̰̟̤̦̮̻͋̽̈̋̌͋̀͒͑̆̐͋̍̋̂͛̽̒͆̀̓͂̏͐͐̔̏̓͂̋̄͆͛͒͗̽̿̒̔͑͂̃͗͊͂̽͌̕͘̕͝͝͝ͅÀ̷̡̧̧̨̨̡̡͚̘̗̭̠̤̫͎̖̹̙̩͎̠͓̻̜̟̥̭̗͙̙͍̱̱̯̱̱̩͈̖͇̯͙̠̼͎̖͎̼͍̟̜̜͇͓̗͉̯͉̜͓̳̲̰̣͉̹͉̙̤̳͍̞̱̼͖͍̬͈̤̲͚̲̜̩̜̹̯̬̪̪̼̝̰̤̲̣̠̥̟̦̪̤̱͕̻̈̈́̍̊̕ͅͅͅͅA̸̧̧̢̧̨̧̨̡̧̧̨̛̛͎͕̬̪̼̳͖̟̖̻͕̲̹͉̩̺̭̦̞͉͖̭͎͕̥̫̳͖̼̥̹͍̤̙̤͍̣̙̮͉͓͙̗͎̻̬̯̟̼͉͙͔̒̈́̎̌͛̒̈̌͒͐͑̓̋̾̉̿͛̓͊̀̾̃͋͛͘̕̕͜͜͜͜͝ͅͅḀ̴̛̛͙̀̊̍̐̀̐̉͐̑̆̿̔̅̈́͋̓͂͒̆̃̋̾̂͋́̽͒͌̓̎͌̀̆̾̓͐̂̏̅́̔͂̀̈́͊͑̾͑̆͂͛͘̚̕͘̕͘̕̕͝͝͝͝͝Ă̸̡̛̛̟̣̠̥̝̠̞̼̹̬͖͇̰͎͈̞͈̰̤̯̠͗̀̈́͌́̂́͆̾̇̇͛̅̄̏̀̀̈̓̅͆͒̄̃͋̋̒͂̈́̐̂̐̄̆̄̂̄̅̓̂̃̑́̅̑̀̏̈́̃͐̌͑̋́͊̀͑͊̅̉̀̊͒̑̆͐̍̃͒̚̚͘̕͘͜͝͝͝A̵̧̨̢̢̛̳͎͖͎͍̦̭̜͙͙̫̟̘̫̰̯͍̙̦̙̫̪͈̗̼̲̲̠̯̣̮͖͈̻̻̰̥̱̰̥͔̰͓̙̙̥̞͓̺̟̎͊̽̍͗̒́͐̔͛̈́̂̐͊͛̅̄̇͜͜͜A̸̢̨̧̨̨̡̧̡̛̙̗̘̜̻̼̫̝͙͔̳͉̻͎̰͕̹͇̳̯͚̩̥̝̱̜̣̬̻̠͙̝̝̼̻͚̝̮̝̪͚̭͓̥̯̱̹͎̖̱͓̖̜̣̟̜̖̟̤̜̠̲̭͇̩̪̺̳̺̘̞̠̞͔̺̦͈̣̟̗̗̜̦̼̹̼̖̝͇̎̈͛͑́́̂͊̀̿͐̈̋͂͊̏͒̎͂̒͋͗̇̀̾̿̒̇̎͌̽͂͑̑̈̇͘̚͘̕̚̕̚͜͜͜͜͜͠͝͠͝͠A̸̧̨̨̡̢̨̨̢̡̛̪̤̙̹̹̺̣͍̟̭̝̺̠̯͙̝̫̹͍͓͔͖̘̳͙̮̳̮̙̫̠̲͔͚͈̱̮̙̭̤̳͉͔̣͈̤̩͖̥̗͍͈̤̳̒̾͗̆̃̂͌̿̌̎̐̈́̈́̑̿̐͌̒̓̆̓̉̿̉̽́̂̈́́̓̉͛̔̈͑̈́̍͑͋͛̀́̓̈͂̀̃̎̓͋͘͘͜͝͝ͅͅÁ̶̧̨̨̨̛͖̞̬̣̦̭̩͉̯͙͚̹͈̬͍̘̖̟͚̪̞̥̣͈̘͎̬̠̭̼͍̗̼̫͔̗̙̟̗̬̰̻̰͙͎̟͖̰̭͇̃̈́͌̒̽̅̃͐̈́̆̾̒̂̽̐̐̌͑̉́̀͂̋̌̂̀̿͒̈́̓̔̈́̒͆̓̿̌͘̕͝ͅA̴̢̢̧̧̧̛͚̺̠̤̠͎̰̫̠͙̳̠̬͓͓̲͉̯͔̘̠̞͚̹̗̫͇͉̹̖̩̬̮̻̝͙̦͕̱̩͉̼̜͕̣̹͇̙̫̞̹̮̲̳͔̼͚̮̥̲͓̯͔̺̘̗̭̝͉̐̓̄̆̏́̀̒̉͌̃̅̉͒̽̓̋͆̊͋͊̅̒̈́͂̀̅͂̋̇̍͊̈́͗̽̍̌̀̓̈́̋̅̂̑̀̾̊͋̂͛͂̅̾̽͛̊͛̍͊̉̉̑̍̆͗̇̓́̑͂͂̓́̅͗̑̈́̚͘̕̕̕͘͜͝͝͠͝͠͠͠͝ͅA̴̧̡̢̡̧̨̛̝̹̺̱͎̬̖̯̯͎͍̟̦̤͔͇͓̪̗̲̦͓̜̙̖̣̤̟̯̹̦̫̞̣̭̭̫̻̠̺̭̺̻̳̙͉̻̠͖̬̘͇̪͙͎͕͓̯̫̻͚͈̼͕͔̣͎̦̣̞̳̤͍̤̯͔͔̫̭̜͊̏̏̍̓̆̂͆̂̓̈́̎̑͛͐̓̑͛͂̈́̈́̀̾͆̐̓̍͆̈́̅́̐̑͒̐̽̅̑̒͘̚͘͜͝͝͠͝͠͝ͅͅͅ
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    Ǎ̵̢̢̡̡̧̨̨̡̢̧̢̡̛̰̦̼̳͎͔͕͎͙̺̘̖̜̹̣̮͇̤͚̱͇̱̰͉͓̮͚͔̤̦̩͎̤̭͕̪̱̘̘̱͕̗̦͓͎͉͇̟͉̜̦̤̼̺͇̰̤̮̘͙̻͕̹̝̻͔̭̱̲̹̬̝͇͍̋̊͊͌̔͋̾̓͌́̈́̀͋͌͗͒͊́̔̂̃̕̚͜͜͜͜͠ͅͅͅA̸̡̨̛͉̭̗̦͈̻̪̗̬͕̮̪̬͕͍͓̦͈͉̜͉̝͙̓̎̀̈̅̏̿́̋̔̔͋̿̿̏̽͆̈́͘Ą̷̢̨̧̧̨̡̛̺̹̠̯͓͕͉͎̫͖̩̩̭̹̤̜̝̼̠̳̲̤͉̺͖̫̝̬͔̬͎̜̖̹͔͖͖͍̳͖͎̤̦͍͉̭̝͙̙͕̻̰͍̥̮͎̲̲̰̹̪̓̒̈́̿̽̃̈́̆̓͌͗͌̉̃̍͒͆͌̓̄̔̔̂͊̍̉̀̐̊̚̚͜ͅA̷̡̢̧̡̧̧̡̛̛̛̛͈̺̞͉̜̙̖̺̜̫̹̱̩͔̘̭̼̰̜͕͍̳͕̣̰̹̠̝͙͖̩̭̮͍̦̞̞̭͉̞͈̻̪̞̼͚̠͎̅̊̈̓̎̃̆̌̿́̍́̾̄̈́̋͌̊̕͘͠͝͝͠ͅͅĄ̸̡̧̡̡̧̧̨̨̨̛͚̞̫̖͔̼̬͖̲̖͚̥̭̳͇̮͕̤̦̪̦͙̝͕̫̮̹̤̥̖̟̳̮̠̲̺̜̟̟̗͈̟̪͙̪̼̫̩̜̩̯̺̟̬̳͇͇̩̬̠̰̻͍̳͔̝̬̝̰̯̣̦̺̖̯̙͉̉͆̈́̇̓̑̀͗̆̽̀̎̅̂̒̒͛̆̔̽͛̒̍̋̄̿̑̀̿͛̄̓͛̄͐͗͂͒̎͊͂͊́̋͑̊̍̇͘̚̚̚͘͜͜͜͝͝͝ͅĂ̴̧̢̡̨̧̢̨̧̧̨̳̗̥̮̳̘̰̘͓͇̼͕̰̞̙͍̠̯͓̞̦̦̥͉͙̺͖͍̱̙̰͕͇̤̻̳͍̣͈̼̲̬͎̪̣̖͔̻̲̹̫̰͖̝̩̩̬̰̰͙̣͓̣̩̰͉̬̜͔̹̦̠͎̥̣͓̱̭̤̹͔̮̝͕̲̍̈́̒͒̎̊̕͜͜͜ͅͅÁ̷̧̢̡͉̬̣̹̱̭̼͔̞̮̖̫̱͈͓͉̲͚̝̩̹͙̮̬̻̞̥̯͇͍̫̭̙̻̠̋̽̄̐̈́̄̏͊̿̆̍̆̅́̃͌͗̓̿̍̈̈́́̆͒͒̈́̈̔̀̀̌̇̌̈́̄̌̄̚̚̚̚̕ͅͅĄ̶̨̢̨̢̧̧̨̢̨̛̛̛̹̙̜̜͚̤̝̘̹̲̗͉̹̳͍͖̣̤̻͈̳̝͈̻͚̖̗̜͈͉̙̺̙̩̩͖̖̰̮̱͙̗̲͔̗͖͍̜͈̟̤͕̱͖͍̜͖̗̜͈̙̪̬̬͎͔̪̰̦̲͕̥̰̩͉̬͔̞̠͍̭̘̯̙̤̫̪͉̩̣͎̣̯̹͈͉̦͕̳̅́̈́̆̓̎̃͗̎̏̓̈̍̑͋̇̀̀̈́͑̃͊͒̽̈̇́̋́̎̑̽͂̈́̂̔͐͛́͋́͒̐̊̊͛̈̎̾̉̀̈́͆̾̀̿̑̑̑͆̋̑̎͌̓̽͐͌́̎̎̎̽̍̂̈́̉̐̀͌́́̆̿̑͐̈̄̽̾̃̊̐̈́͗̏̚̕̚̚͘̚͝͝͝͝Ä̶̧̢̨̧̧̡̡̧̡̛̛̛̛͓̖͇̗̣͇̭͍͔͔̗͖̖͖̪̩̤̖̣̘̰̦̮̱̳̭͓͎̪͖͍͙̲̠̣̹̬͔̞͍͈͔͙̬͍͇͙̱̠̭̘͕͍̮̲͉̫̼͈͕̳̣̱̤͔̟̯̺̗̭͚̫̤̜̺̝̩̅̐͌̀̿͗̃̂̓̐͒̔́͋̓̂̐̋͊͋̈́̀̄͑̄̍̓͒̅̐̈́̒̒̉͐̄̓̔͌̓̔̆̑̈́͛̽͛͂̈́̆̚̕̚̕͜͠͠͝͝͝ͅͅͅͅͅȀ̵̢̢̨̧̛͕̭̬̫̠̺̯̟̫̠͍̣̪͇͕̙̳̤̼͔̘̪̘͓̲̦̹̰̩̻̟͍̙̰̙͉̐̇̍̽͊́̀̒͋̃͆̾͌́̃͑͑̈́͒͐͊̈́͂̾̋̈͌̆̾̈́͒̋͌̌̏̀̀̆͆͗̌̾͊̃́̃̆̿̋̐̇́̋̓̍̀̈́̉͗̌́̀͌͒͊͂͒̇͗͊̕̕͘͘̕̚̚͜͠͝͠͝Ą̶̡̧̧̧̡̧̢̡̡̛̛̛̛̛͓̤̬͕͈̟͔͖̭̼̰̼͕͓̹̱̤͕̖̮̰̼͇̤̬̩̥̝̦̩̠̗͓̳̻̟̝̦̥̩̻͆̃̈́̎͐̐̔̇̈̑̔̉̂͊͊̈́̄̏̀̃́̎͐̓̎͛̐̔͂͗̔̊͛̂̆͆̅̏͌̎͋͌̂͛͐́̅̿̉̎̀̀̐͗̏̒̑̔̏̑̏͂̓̓̀͊̈̈́̾̆̚̕̚̕͘͘͘̕̕̕̕͜͜͝͝͝͝ͅͅĄ̷̗̗̮̣̯̜̞͙̜͇̟͔̥̰͓͇̬̩͓̫͖̪͔͇̳̏̅̆̊͗͆̿̎̿̋̀̏̅̀͑͆́͂̓̿̄͂̏̌̈́̔̂͐̊͛̑͊̿̽̌̍̈́̍͒͗̇̀̑͘̚͜͜͝͝Ä̵̡̛̛̛̞̙͕̫̯̫̤͓͍̟̱́̏͛̃͗͌͂͊͋̆̀̊̂̒̿̑̇̀͋̂͋̓͗̾͐̒̀̆̀̄̌̓͂̃͋͂̒̏̈́̈́̓̆͋̊͋͗̾͆͋̾̄̿̏̊̐̅̐͗̓̏͆̅̃͗͗̾̇͑̓̋̒̿̂̔͒́͋̐͌̔͒̑͛̈́̔̋͗̌̓̂̈̀͗̾̕̕̚̚̕͘͠͝͠͝͝͝͠͝͝ͅͅͅA̴̛͉͌̿̊͐͒̿̈́̓̾̆̄̇̈́̈́͛͘̕A̷̧̡̡̢̱̭̣̫̻̭͕̝̬̪̪̥̖̪̩͚̣̬̫͓̰̤̹̮̥̫̺̻̲̗̥̝̹͖̟̋̐̌͋͂̀̄̓̽͆̅̑͊͊͋̌̔̂̂̕͝͝ͅÀ̷̢̢̧̢̨̛̪̳̹̫̪͚̫̘̩̖̠̲̣̲̳̞̙̹̤̘̱̥̗̫̙̤̝̩̬̖͙̘̠͇̬͖̩̙̥̘̪̞͎͖̜̹̱̝͔̘͕̮͚͓̞͎̖̣̺̠̠̲̤̠̻͈̹̤̗̣̪̹͖̗͔̱̙͔̼̦̰͍̝̜̮̯̮͉̏̉̿̏̎́̀͑̈́͗̒̈̀̄͛͛̊͑͐͛́̊̎͊͛͌̿̌̄̈̄͌͌̆̿̀͌̉̒̽̈͌̓̿̔͋̐̍̅̅̋͒̓́̑̔́̄̅͂͗̌̎̆̀̉̾̔̍̓̚̚̚̚̕͜͜͠͝͝͝͠͝ͅͅͅͅA̷̡̡̧̛̛̛̳͕̦͎̖̠̦͙̰̲̣̭̼̣̣͚͈̻̰͇̖̰͓̮̙̙̜̹̞̻̣̦̠̤̖̪̰͓̫̺̝͊̒̐̾͐̓̈́̍͒̌̈͑͛̓̇͑̈́̽͑̉̎̿̐̓̋͗̾͐͋͆̀̏̾͗̌̈́̈́̎̒̀̂͆́̀̌͐̐̎̾̍̾̽̽̂̓̉͑́͐̍̿̈̑̉̂̓̈̌̋̋̕̕͘̚̚̕͘̕͜͜͝͠͠͝͠ͅẢ̴̡̡̨̧̢̡̨̛̹̝̠̙̲̦̰̦̰̘̭͈̻͈̗̳̖̜̭͍̠̱̤̟̜̫̹̺̩̫̪͎̘̭̺͔̰̯̪̖͈̪̙̱͙̟̖͚̣̲̜̱̭̰̫̄͑̌͒́͐̈́͌͌́̑͆̈́̑̓̉̂͋̊͘͜͜͜͠Ą̴̨̨̨̧̨̨̢̢̧̨̡̲͕̩̮̼̦̜̳̱̗̱̰̱̣͙̫̫̣̙̬̖̖̯̯̦͇͉̟͍̖̬̰͚̪̬̞̬̬̤̲̟̠̤̯̥̗̮̱̗͕͓̻͚͖͚̱̪̗̜̻̟̪̰̣̝̤̫̠͎̖̭̫͉͇͎̺̻͎̯̲̖͓̬̻͔̲͌͐̉͛̀̽̄̋͆͌̉͐̂̽̂̆͒̎̂̄͘͜͠ͅÅ̷̡̡̩̼͈̪̹̘̬̳̘͈̯̪̬͖̜̖̩͖̪̱͖̹̤̘͖̤͈͙͎̺̭̫̙͕͇̪̜͖͓͉̗̱̦͉̮͚̺̻̗͉̻̖̬̺̖̬̻̥̮̗̻̝͍̞̜̖̝̠͖̯͍͓̖̘͉̰̟̟̼̣̭̉͆̂͌̾̅͊̒͛̑̎̊̏̈́́́̊̽͂̈́͛̃̀̿̌͗̆̔̏̏̅̐̽́̒̊͆͐̋̍̀͊͌̏͒̑̈́͗̽͘̕̕̕̚͘̕͜͜͝͝͝͝͝ͅA̸̡̡͚͈̠̱͓̙̻̱̺̫̙̩̥͈͎͔̤̫͈̬͚͈̠̙̤̘͉̩͉̞͔̼̟̪͈͍͍̞̗̥͖͋̇̄̇̓̀̋̔̚̚͜͜͜͠À̸̧̢̡̢̢̧̛̗͎̜͉͎̥̳͍̪̭̼̘͕̰̤̞̺̜̯̜̩͉̣͇̰̫͎͈̗̱̟̳̫̘̰̟̤̦̮̻͋̽̈̋̌͋̀͒͑̆̐͋̍̋̂͛̽̒͆̀̓͂̏͐͐̔̏̓͂̋̄͆͛͒͗̽̿̒̔͑͂̃͗͊͂̽͌̕͘̕͝͝͝ͅÀ̷̡̧̧̨̨̡̡͚̘̗̭̠̤̫͎̖̹̙̩͎̠͓̻̜̟̥̭̗͙̙͍̱̱̯̱̱̩͈̖͇̯͙̠̼͎̖͎̼͍̟̜̜͇͓̗͉̯͉̜͓̳̲̰̣͉̹͉̙̤̳͍̞̱̼͖͍̬͈̤̲͚̲̜̩̜̹̯̬̪̪̼̝̰̤̲̣̠̥̟̦̪̤̱͕̻̈̈́̍̊̕ͅͅͅͅA̸̧̧̢̧̨̧̨̡̧̧̨̛̛͎͕̬̪̼̳͖̟̖̻͕̲̹͉̩̺̭̦̞͉͖̭͎͕̥̫̳͖̼̥̹͍̤̙̤͍̣̙̮͉͓͙̗͎̻̬̯̟̼͉͙͔̒̈́̎̌͛̒̈̌͒͐͑̓̋̾̉̿͛̓͊̀̾̃͋͛͘̕̕͜͜͜͜͝ͅͅḀ̴̛̛͙̀̊̍̐̀̐̉͐̑̆̿̔̅̈́͋̓͂͒̆̃̋̾̂͋́̽͒͌̓̎͌̀̆̾̓͐̂̏̅́̔͂̀̈́͊͑̾͑̆͂͛͘̚̕͘̕͘̕̕͝͝͝͝͝Ă̸̡̛̛̟̣̠̥̝̠̞̼̹̬͖͇̰͎͈̞͈̰̤̯̠͗̀̈́͌́̂́͆̾̇̇͛̅̄̏̀̀̈̓̅͆͒̄̃͋̋̒͂̈́̐̂̐̄̆̄̂̄̅̓̂̃̑́̅̑̀̏̈́̃͐̌͑̋́͊̀͑͊̅̉̀̊͒̑̆͐̍̃͒̚̚͘̕͘͜͝͝͝A̵̧̨̢̢̛̳͎͖͎͍̦̭̜͙͙̫̟̘̫̰̯͍̙̦̙̫̪͈̗̼̲̲̠̯̣̮͖͈̻̻̰̥̱̰̥͔̰͓̙̙̥̞͓̺̟̎͊̽̍͗̒́͐̔͛̈́̂̐͊͛̅̄̇͜͜͜A̸̢̨̧̨̨̡̧̡̛̙̗̘̜̻̼̫̝͙͔̳͉̻͎̰͕̹͇̳̯͚̩̥̝̱̜̣̬̻̠͙̝̝̼̻͚̝̮̝̪͚̭͓̥̯̱̹͎̖̱͓̖̜̣̟̜̖̟̤̜̠̲̭͇̩̪̺̳̺̘̞̠̞͔̺̦͈̣̟̗̗̜̦̼̹̼̖̝͇̎̈͛͑́́̂͊̀̿͐̈̋͂͊̏͒̎͂̒͋͗̇̀̾̿̒̇̎͌̽͂͑̑̈̇͘̚͘̕̚̕̚͜͜͜͜͜͠͝͠͝͠A̸̧̨̨̡̢̨̨̢̡̛̪̤̙̹̹̺̣͍̟̭̝̺̠̯͙̝̫̹͍͓͔͖̘̳͙̮̳̮̙̫̠̲͔͚͈̱̮̙̭̤̳͉͔̣͈̤̩͖̥̗͍͈̤̳̒̾͗̆̃̂͌̿̌̎̐̈́̈́̑̿̐͌̒̓̆̓̉̿̉̽́̂̈́́̓̉͛̔̈͑̈́̍͑͋͛̀́̓̈͂̀̃̎̓͋͘͘͜͝͝ͅͅÁ̶̧̨̨̨̛͖̞̬̣̦̭̩͉̯͙͚̹͈̬͍̘̖̟͚̪̞̥̣͈̘͎̬̠̭̼͍̗̼̫͔̗̙̟̗̬̰̻̰͙͎̟͖̰̭͇̃̈́͌̒̽̅̃͐̈́̆̾̒̂̽̐̐̌͑̉́̀͂̋̌̂̀̿͒̈́̓̔̈́̒͆̓̿̌͘̕͝ͅA̴̢̢̧̧̧̛͚̺̠̤̠͎̰̫̠͙̳̠̬͓͓̲͉̯͔̘̠̞͚̹̗̫͇͉̹̖̩̬̮̻̝͙̦͕̱̩͉̼̜͕̣̹͇̙̫̞̹̮̲̳͔̼͚̮̥̲͓̯͔̺̘̗̭̝͉̐̓̄̆̏́̀̒̉͌̃̅̉͒̽̓̋͆̊͋͊̅̒̈́͂̀̅͂̋̇̍͊̈́͗̽̍̌̀̓̈́̋̅̂̑̀̾̊͋̂͛͂̅̾̽͛̊͛̍͊̉̉̑̍̆͗̇̓́̑͂͂̓́̅͗̑̈́̚͘̕̕̕͘͜͝͝͠͝͠͠͠͝ͅA̴̧̡̢̡̧̨̛̝̹̺̱͎̬̖̯̯͎͍̟̦̤͔͇͓̪̗̲̦͓̜̙̖̣̤̟̯̹̦̫̞̣̭̭̫̻̠̺̭̺̻̳̙͉̻̠͖̬̘͇̪͙͎͕͓̯̫̻͚͈̼͕͔̣͎̦̣̞̳̤͍̤̯͔͔̫̭̜͊̏̏̍̓̆̂͆̂̓̈́̎̑͛͐̓̑͛͂̈́̈́̀̾͆̐̓̍͆̈́̅́̐̑͒̐̽̅̑̒͘̚͘͜͝͝͠͝͠͝ͅͅͅ
    

 July 22nd, 2025
    I don't know how much more I can take it. All I've seen here in the last 4
    years is losing friends, losing jobs, and losing my fucking mind. I can't 
    keep doing this stupid shit. Something needs to happen FAST or I'm doing
    something irrational. Every single decision I can think of to maybe 
    improve my life either ends in success or me blowing my fucking brains out.
    Do i quit my amazing privilege of a job for something that will be worse
    and move to a new city hoping that I can find my people? Do i stay 
    at my job and move to a new city and deal with the shitty commute?
    Do i stay here and hope for the best? Every which way I look, it either
    works or I take my life. I can't live alone. I can't do that, it's horrible
    for my mental health. My roommate is also the person stopping me from doing
    it, I don't want to stain his floor with my organic matter. I don't want
    to traumatize him with the sight of a hole in my head. I just wish this 
    country had assisted suicide, I would've taken that years ago. I don't 
    see a light at the end of this tunnel and I can't take another year of this.
    I'm not sure what I need to do. I'm doing everything I can and nothing gets
    better. and my entire fucking fear is happening again. I've said time and 
    time again that I need a relationship because when all my male friends
    get into them, they fuck off and stop doing things with the guys. and 
    that's exactly what's happening. and I can't keep doing this cycle of making
    friends and then them leaving because they find what I've been looking for 
    this entire time. I want to die.

 July 20th, 2025
      I woke up angry. It was my sister's birthday celebration. I should be happy, I'm
      happy for her, but it was just so hard to be okay during it. Nothing happened,
      it went really well for a family celebration, but I just wasn't having it.
      I just loathe life right now. I just wish something good would happen to me.
      I'm progressing, but my life is not improving. I don't know what it's gonna take
      for things to improve.

 July 19th, 2025
      I woke up emotionally distraught. My entire day felt like fight or flight. 
      Really wanted to go to the flea market to get some more cool old clothes, 
      but I drove up and couldn't get myself to get out and walk up; I didn't want to
      talk to ANYONE. I hate it, but it's a feeling that I have to go through in my 
      depressive episodes.

     July 18th, 2025
        I'm tired. Exhausted. Both cats are sick. I'm stressed, too tired to do
        much. I'm mad at Matt. I see him and it angers me, to feel so betrayed
        by something so little. I confided in him and he made me feel like 
        there was someone else who was feeling the same as myself.
        I'm not sure where I sit in my bipolar spectrum right now.
        I think my medication fights me. It's doing what it's supposed to,
        but my brain really doesn't like it. It wants to be sad and I don't get
        why. And at the same time, I'm picking up a random new hobby/interest 
        during a high emotional change, which usually happens immediately prior
        to a hypomanic state for me. 
    

    July 17th, 2025
        Today was mentally exhausting. Woke up to my younger cat with diarrhea
        out of nowhere. Took her to the emergency vet and spent nearly 3 hours
        there and received a steep bill. While I was at the vet, I got messaged
        by 4 different people to make sure to finish these prototype parts
        by the end of day and asking for updates. I took her home, made sure 
        she was alright, and went to work worried about her. Spent all day  
        making these parts and getting them together with constant scrutiny.
        "this is off center" or "can you make it look better" while only giving
        me 23 hours to complete this task. I was able to do it, but it
        exhausted me. I went home to the same cat puking now too, and went back
        to the emergency vet, to sit there for 2 more hours trying to find 
        something wrong. They gave her anti-nausea medicine and that made her
        a bit better.